This is the transcript for the episode Curse of the Metrognome.
| (Episode starts on the news.) | |
| Chance | 10, 9, 8! And that's just some of the countdown tonight, as we ring in the extra new year. |
| Buzz | Last week Mayor Mellow noticed the town calendar had an extra January in it, and took action. |
| Mayor Mellow | So the town calendar is misprinted. Peaceville ain't gonna get down, it's gonna get down! It's New Year's Eve, all over again. And it's mandatory! |
| Chance | Some say that the Mayor is forcing everyone to party, so they don't blame him for wasting $10,000,000 on a huge gold calendar. |
| (Screen turns off on Grojband's TV.) | |
| Laney | I can't believe the Mayor's forcing us to have New Year's Eve again. |
| Kin | He can force it all he wants, as long as he forces us to be the New Year's Eve band! |
| Kon | For free! |
| Laney | With no New Year's Eve lyrics. |
| Corey | Easy guy, we've got the rest of the year to get lyrics. What we really need is perfect timing to rock out at exactly midnight. |
| Kin | Then we better not run into a Metronome! |
| (Kin looks over to Corey, who's holding a ticking metronome.) | |
| Corey | How's this a problem? It keeps timing for the band. |
| Kon | Not that one. The 'Metrognome'! That steals timing from a band! |
| (Kin and Kon look at each other and jump into the air and screen shows a Rock Lore visual.) | |
| Kin & Kon | It's Rock Lore time! |
| Kon | Since New Year's Eve in ancient times, bands ringing in the New Year have had a nemesis. |
| (Grojband is playing in visual, and Metrognome zaps them with his magic.) | |
| Metrognome | Magic! |
| (Band plays out of sync.) | |
| Corey | Huh? |
| Metrognome | Hahaha! Gnomosity! |
| (Rock Lore visual ends.) | |
| Kon | With their timing stolen, bands could never play again. It's a good thing those guys weren't really us. |
| Kin | Also a good thing that it's not really New Year's Eve, and the Metrognome is hibernating. |
| Corey | That's a relief, because that magic Metrognome could ruin our gig! |
| Trina | Did you just hear that, Mina? |
| Mina | Sure. I overheard the whole first scene. |
| Trina | This is my extra New Year's Eve, and my chance to erase the Nick-kissing failures from the past! |
| (Trina has a flashback from a New Year's Eve in the past.) | |
| Crowd | 3, 2, 1, Happy New Year! |
| Nick | Nick is two seconds into the new year, and things are looking good. |
| Trina | Oh no, wait. |
| (Trina starts to run over to Nick.) | |
| Trina | Happy New- |
| (Trina trips on a wire and crashes into Nick.) | |
| (Scene plays back in slow mo on tv above stage.) | |
| (Flashback ends.) | |
| Trina | Super anyway. Corey's music is not going to pollute my moment! Let's find that magic elf and ruin his gig! |
| Mina | Gnome. |
| Trina | Since you're such a 'those-things' scientist, where do we find one? |
| (Wicked Cool Transition with a truck driving by and the singer saying "Random Truck Transition".) | |
| (Trina and Mina are at a gnome-buying place.) | |
| Mina | Where are your gnomes? |
| (Seller points to some garden gnomes.) | |
| Trina | Ugh. We mean the magic ones. |
| (Seller points to a small mushroom house.) | |
| (Trina and Mina tiptoe to the house, lifting it off the ground.) | |
| Metrognome | Hey! What are you- |
| (Trina kidnaps him and drops him back outside the garage.) | |
| Metrognome | |
| Trina | Boo, hoo. I ruined wittle baby's wittle nap time. Does he need his wittle bottle? |
| Metrognome | Wittle? Bottle? I eat timing, and lots of it! Heck, I could eat so much- |
| Trina | Wow, so much talking. Just go ruin my brother's New Year's Eve gig already! |
| Metrognome | It's New Year's Eve already? But I- |
| (Trina kicks the Metrognome into the garage.) | |
| Metrognome | Someone's gonna get a fist full a gnome! |
| Kon | I feel like I've imagined you before. Wait, you're... Tiny Santa! |
| (Kon grabs the Metrognome and hugs him.) | |
| Metrognome | Let, me, go! You're crushing me arms! |
| (Kon lets go and drops him on the ground.) | |
| Kin | He's too short to be Tiny Santa. He's more like a hover-baby. |
| Metrognome | Baby?! I'm a thousand and a half! |
| Corey | Why would someone brag about being so old? |
| Metrognome | That's it. I'm grumpy! I'm awake! And it's New Year's Eve. So let's eat! Are you the band? |
| Laney | We're a band. |
| Metrognome | Magic! |
| (The Metrognome zaps Grojband with his magic.) | |
| (His beard grows bigger and the Metrognome laughs.) | |
| Metrognome | Deal with it, leggers! |
| Corey | Before I talk about how strange that was, let me finish my ice tea. |
| (Corey opens his mouth to drink after he spills the ice tea onto himself.) | |
| Kon | Ha! Looks like that ice tea just finished you! |
| Kin & Kon | Oooohhh! |
| (Kon high-fives Kin too early and ends up hitting his head.) | |
| Kin | Hey, you were too early! |
| Laney | Guys, let's talk about how strange that was after we practice. |
| (Grojband are now on the stage with their instruments.) | |
| (Kon counts them in awkwardly and Grojband starts to play out of sync.) | |
| Corey | Woah, what happened to our timing? |
| Trina | Epic triumph! I used that little leprechaun to mess you up! Now you can't ruin my perfect New Year's Eve kiss with Nick. Ha! |
| Kin | That hover-baby must have been the Metrognome! |
| (Kin gasps.) | |
| Kin | He ate our timing! |
| Corey | But we can't play without timing. We gotta find that gnome, fast. |
| (Screen goes over to Trina and Mina who are at the stage where Mayor Mellow is setting up with a police guard.) | |
| Mayor Mellow | When this cube drops, it's time to hop! And if anyone gives me any lip about my huge gold calendar, you lock 'em up. Got it? |
| Trina | The lighty-up cube thingy should go on the left to catch my good side. |
| Mayor Mellow | Cube goes where it goes. Try your other left. |
| Mina | Your other left side is your best side too, Trina. But we did already pour the glue to trap Nick... |
| (Wicked Cool Transition with Nick's head covered in glue and the singer singing "Nicky Nick Transition".) | |
| (Screen goes to Metrognome, who's floating down the sidewalk.) | |
| Metrognome (singing) | I'm floating in the air... Not wearing socks. |
| (Grojband are hiding in the alley.) | |
| Corey | Let's grab him on three. One, two- |
| Kon | Four! |
| (Kon pushes all of them out and they fall to the ground, without catching the Metrognome.) | |
| Metrognome | Woah, are you trying to catch me? 'Cause you don't have the timing for that! |
| (The Metrognome laughs.) | |
| Metrognome | I eat timing that goes right into the old bearderino. |
| Laney | So... what? We eat your beard and we get our timing back? |
| Metrognome | No? |
| Kin | Of course! He's too small to fit it in his wittle tummy! |
| Metrgnome | You saying that I can't eat? I can eat any timing! Where's the buffet? |
| (Metrognome hides behind a bush and spies on Sparkles and his owner.) | |
| Sparkles' Owner | Come on, boy! You've got to be awesome at catching. |
| (The Metrognome zaps them with his magic.) | |
| Metrgnome | Magic! |
| (Sparkles' owner throws a Frisbee but Sparkles bites his owner's hand instead.) | |
| Sparkles' Owner | Agh! Not now. You are not awesome! |
| (The Metrognome laughs while his beard grows bigger.) | |
| (Now the Metrognome goes over to Sausage Barney who is serving hot dogs at his stand.) | |
| (The Metrognome zaps him with his magic.) | |
| Metrognome | Magic! |
| (Sausage Barney picks up a freshly-made sausage and puts it in his hand.) | |
| Sausage Barney | Ahhh! The bun goes first! How could I mess that up? Oh, I smell the pain. |
| (Metrognome laughs once again while his beard grows even bigger.) | |
| (The Metrognome goes to a clock shop and zaps the Swiss man working at the counter with magic.) | |
| Metrognome | Magic! |
| (Captain Tighty-Wighty walks up to counter.) | |
| Captain Tighty-Wighty | Arrgh, matey! Can ye tell me what- |
| Swiss man | Time to get a watch! Ha! Hmm. I seem to have lost my comedic timing! |
| (Wicked Cool Transition with Corey strumming his guitar and singer singing "Something Song Transition".) | |
| (Screen goes back to where Trina has been earlier.) | |
| Mayor Mellow | Just disregard the gold calendar and have a good night, or else! |
| (Nick has his feet stuck in the glue.) | |
| Nick | Nick loves New Year's Eve but wonders why there's so much glue. |
| Trina | It's like, like I always say. You just have to trap the moment! |
| Mina | Trina, I have to use the washroom... |
| Trina | Still? Ugh, that was so an hour ago! |
| (Metrognome floats by, moaning.) | |
| Metrognome | Ugh, so full... |
| (Corey drops down to catch him too late.) | |
| Corey | Gotcha! Oof. |
| (Metrognome floats by some stereos that Kin and Kon are hiding behind and belches.) | |
| (Kin and Kon crash into each other due to being too late.) | |
| Laney | How do we catch him without any timing? |
| Metrognome | Ugh. Don't say timing. My beard's about to explode... |
| Corey | Yup. I think you're right. You couldn't handle anymore time. |
| Metrognome | The heck I can't! I'm unstoppable. |
| Corey | Sure ya are, Gnomey. But that big shiny cube has way too much timing in it. Even for you. |
| Metrognome | Oh yeah? Watch this, fool! |
| (Metrognome leaves and Corey goes back to the band.) | |
| Corey | Hahaha! Old Gnomey will try and gobble up all the timing in the cube and boom, he'll explode! |
| Laney | Assuming it works and we can eat his exploded beard and get our timing back, we still need lyrics! |
| Corey | And we'll get 'em, fella. Once Trina's big moment with Nick, is ruined. |
| Crowd | 10, 9, 8, 7, 6... |
| (Metrognome goes up to the cube and zaps it.) | |
| Metrognome | Magic! |
| (The Metrognome's beard grows even bigger.) | |
| Metrognome | Oh yeah! This gnome eats like a troll! |
| (Metrognome's beard rumbles.) | |
| Metrognome | Oh, my beard sounds weird. |
| Crowd | 10, 4, 7, 5! |
| Nick | Crazy countdown. I guess the year could end at any moment. |
| Trina | Any moment? Oh no. I can't miss my chance to kiss Nick for a whole 'nother year! |
| Nick | 8, 5, 2... |
| (Trina attempts to kiss Nick but knocks him to the ground instead.) | |
| Trina | Again? I did it again? No! |
| (Trina goes into Diary Mode and falls to the ground.) | |
| (Corey catches Trina's Diary.) | |
| Corey | Yes! |
| (The Metrognome belches.) | |
| Metrognome | Ahaha! |
| (Metrognome belches again.) | |
| Metrognome | I told you I was unstoppable! |
| (Metrognome laughs.) | |
| Metrognome | Uh-oh. |
| (The Metrognome's beard expands and he explodes.) | |
| (Kin tastes one of the falling beard flakes.) | |
| Kin | Mmm, tastes like cotton candy. |
| (Kon drinks some beard flakes from a teacup.) | |
| (Corey and Laney try catching beard flakes on their tongues, not aware of where they're going and accidentally kiss.) | |
| Corey | Woooww... |
| (Corey and Laney shake their heads and go back to reality.) | |
| Corey | I mean... woah! S-sorry, Laney. |
| Laney | No, I was just... cotton candy... |
| Crowd (offscreen) | 3, 2, 1, Happy New Year! |
| (Screen cuts to Grojband who are on stage performing.) | |
| Corey (singing) | Another year has come and gone and things are still the same
If nothing goes our way this year, we've... |
| Corey & Laney | Got ourselves to blame. |
| All | We've got ourselves to blame my friends if nothing goes our way.
We've got ourselves to blame our friends if we waste another day. |
| Corey | So let us turn the page tonight,
Grab life by the face and yank. |
| Kin & Kon (speaking) | Yank it real good. |
| Corey | Let's plant a kiss right on its lips
Then we'll have ourselves to thank. |
| All | We'll have ourselves to thank, my friends, when something goes our way
We'll have ourselves to thank, my friends, when we make today our day |
| Corey | When we make today our day! |
| (Fireworks explode in the sky saying "Grojband Rocks!" and then screen goes back onto the stage.) | |
| Corey | Yeaaaah! |
| Laney | Happy New Year, Corey. |
| (Laney attempts to kiss Corey again.) | |
| Corey | Is it, fella? |
| (Spotlight shines on Corey.) | |
| Corey | Can a year be happy if you haven't lived it yet? Can it be new if you live it the same way? Is it still a year if it only lasts a few months? So many, many, many questions, like the whiskers of a beard. |
| (Spotlight turns off.) | |
| Laney | Might wanna write that down for next year. |
| Mayor Mellow | You kids better start dancing, or it's the slammer for the lot of you. |
| (Grojband start dancing.) | |
| Corey | Thanks for coming out everyone. |
| (Corey closes garage door.) |