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!Nick |
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Latest revision as of 12:37, 16 January 2021
This is a transcript for the episode "Soulin' Down the Road".
(The episode opens with Kin tinkering with a toaster in the garage) | |
Kon Kujira | So, when you're done with that thing, will it feel stuff? |
Kin Kujira | No! I'm just making it so it'll toast happy faces on my toast. |
Kon | It would be cool if it toasted a face for whatever mood it was in. |
Kin | If we programmed a soul, we'd be telling it how to feel. Creepy! |
Kon | You're already telling it how to toast, dude! |
Laney Penn | If I don't get a smile on this soon, |
(Laney is shown pointing at a piece of bread) | |
Laney | you're gonna get a frown on this. |
(Laney points at her face and frowns) | |
Corey Riffin | Guys! |
(Corey slides down the bannister) | |
Corey | Tell me all about soul! |
Kon | In a toaster context? |
Corey | In a music context! |
Kin/Kon | Soul music?! |
Kin | Rhythm and Blues plus Rock 'n' Roll! |
Kon | Is the recipe for 50's soul! |
(Kin and Kon show a Rock Lore with four African American singers performing) | |
Kin | The Motivations were the princes of 50's soul music. If they had a feelin' that needed revealin', they'd let music do the healin'. |
Frontman | (singing) Ooh, baby |
Backup Singers | Baby, baby, yeah |
Frontman | I'm hurting and longing |
Backup Singers | Baby, baby, yeah! |
Frontman | But I just can't sing out |
Backup Singers | Baby, baby, yeah |
Frontman | My heart has to ring out! |
Backup Singers | Baby, baby, yeah |
Frontman | And testify |
Backup Singers | Baby, baby, yeah |
(The backup singers continue through Kin and Kon's exposition) | |
Kin | You don't just play soul music, you gotta feel it. It has to come from the soul. |
Kon | When you try to fake it, you just can't make it! |
Kin | Baby! |
(Kin's vocalization stops the song and the scene pops back to the garage) | |
Corey | Well, Grojband needs to feel some feelings. It's 50's night at the drive-in and I booked us to play some soul music! |
Kin/Kon | WHAT?! |
Kin | Weren't you listening to our imaginations?! We'll never pull it off unless we feel the soul inside! |
Kon | This isn't the 50's, Corey! People don't have feelings anymore! |
Laney | I think I feel a frown coming on. |
(Laney looks at the piece of bread in her hand which Corey then places in the toaster) | |
Corey | What if we pumped-up our souls with some kinda amplifier? |
Kin | I think I can build something that'll help us. |
(There is a close-up of Kin's face) | |
Kin | Or cause untold horrors! (laughing maniacally) |
(The toast pops up with a smiley face on it) | |
Corey/Laney/Kin/Kon | Yay! |
(Toasty Skull Transition) | |
(The scene transitions to Trina at the Peaceville Movie-in-your-Car Barn holding a blue skirt with a poodle on it) | |
Trina Riffin | There's like, minus five ways I'm wearing this. |
Movie-in-your-Car Barney | It's '50s night, Trina, and that's what skirts was like in the '50s. The Peaceville Movie-in-your-Car Barn insists that youse wear it. |
(Trina is typing on her phone) | |
Movie-in-your-Car Barney | Hold on! I got a Bleat. "Trina Riffin so totally just quit her job and junk." Wh-what?! |
(Trina quickly leaves, dropping the skirt on the floor, before being shown inside her car) | |
Mina Beff | Way to quit your job over a skirt, Trina! So, if you have the day off, I was thinking we could have a BFF girl fun road trip! |
Trina | But Mina, you're not in my car and I'm leaving. |
(Trina drives off, with flames following her) | |
Mina | That's fair. I'll plan ahead next time, Trina! |
(The scene transitions back to the garage where Kin has made a soul amplifying camera) | |
Kin | I suped-up this spirit energy camera with a dreamcatcher and some crystals! It'll amp our souls up for sure! I'll start the timer. |
(Kin pushes the lever on the toaster and does a pose with Corey and Kon against the garage door) | |
Corey | Quick, while Laney's mouth is too full to harsh on this plan! |
(Trina's car is heard, making the band run out of the way) | |
Corey/Laney/Kin/Kon | AHH! |
(Trina's car crashes through the garage door and knocks the camera, which sends an energy beam that separates Trina's soul from her body before the camera smashes on the floor) | |
(Laney swallows her toast) | |
Laney | I'm not sure about this plan, Core. |
Kin | Hmm. She wrecked the machine. I can fix it, but we need a new camera from that kiosk at the mall. |
(The band goes up to Trina, who is asleep) | |
Corey | (sarcastically) Don't get up, Trina, we're fine! |
(Corey taps Trina on the head) | |
Corey | (sigh) Let's get that camera, guys. |
(Grojband leaves while Trina starts talking, although she's still asleep) | |
Trina | Corey, get out of my grill! Ha! Car puns! Wait. Why can't I feel, like, my parts and whatever? What the what is going on?! I'm in my car... |
(Trina's car doors and bonnet open) | |
Trina | I am my car! |
(Trina's car doors and bonnet close) | |
Trina | (gasp) Wait! Boys love cars. Nick's a boy. Nick will love me! I gotta dump this limp body before I ask him out! |
(Trina drives off, leaving a trail of flames as the scene transitions to her talking to Mina) | |
Trina | So, yeah. Let's totally go on this lame road trip. But, I'm not gonna move or talk. Kay? |
Mina | No problem, Trina! |
(Mina removes Trina's body from her car and drags it along the floor) | |
Mina | I'm just glad I get to plan the trip. |
(Mina places Trina's body in her motorcycle's sidecar with a helmet) | |
Mina | We'll take so many BFF selfies! |
(Mina takes a selfie of her and Trina before driving off) | |
Trina | So... |
(Trina slams her car door shut) | |
Trina | How does a super cute girl car spend her day? Makeover! |
(Trina drives off and the scene transitions to Grojband at The Quackery Shack) | |
Chipper | Triple double bubblegum. Triple double bubblegum. Triple double bubblegum. |
Kin | (clears throat) |
Chipper | Welcome back to The Quackery Shack! We believe in everything! |
Kin | We need another spirit camera. |
Chipper | Cool! Are you taking pictures of auras? Or ghosts? Or spirit orbs?! They all exist, you know? |
Kon | Don't be ridiculous! We're amping up our soul energies so we can play music at a drive-in, you crackpot! |
Chipper | Hmph! This is our last camera |
(Chipper presents a spirit camera and throws it at Kon) | |
Chipper | and it only has one shot left on it. No one makes that old-timey film anymore. |
Kon | Say 'cheese!' |
(Kon poses for a selfie while pointing the camera at himself) | |
Kin | DON'T! |
(Kin snatches the camera back from Kon) | |
Kon | What? |
Corey | Let's hope Trina doesn't photobomb us this time. |
(Trina's engine revs and she is seen driving inside the mall) | |
Corey | AHHH! |
Trina | Super move it! |
(Trina speeds past Grojband, leaving a trail of flames) | |
Corey | Did anyone else just not see Trina driving her car?! |
(The scene transitions to a red shoe at a shoe store) | |
Trina | (gasp) Shoes! |
(Trina runs over the shoe) | |
Trina | Uh! They don't fit. Whatever. |
(Trina reverses out of the store, leaving a trail of flames as Grojband watch) | |
(The scene shows Trina with a blue skirt on her grille) | |
Saleswoman | Hmm. That makes your bumper look big. |
(Trina revs her engine, scaring the saleswoman) | |
Trina | It's my size! |
(Trina drives into the mirror, cracking it) | |
Trina | Your mirror is BROKEN! |
(Trina reverses out of the store, leaving a trail of flames) | |
(Another saleswoman is shown putting pink lip gloss on a donkey before being honked and driven at by Trina) | |
Trina | Kiss-tastic lip gloss! GIMME! |
(The saleswoman grabs a handful of lip gloss and wipes it on Trina's grille as Grojband watches) | |
Laney | Weird. It's like Trina's car has a mind of its own! |
Kin | Or... a soul! |
(Kin shows the spirit camera's picture of Trina's soul leaving her body) | |
Kin | The machine was too strong. It shoved her soul out of her body and into her car! Kinda cool, actually. |
Laney | We've only got one soul shot left. We either get Trina's soul back into her body or boost our own souls for the gig. |
Corey | With Trina trapped in her car, we can kiss our regular diary lyrics goodbye! We gotta get her out. |
Kon | Think she'll drive us home? We've done a lot of walking today. |
(Pictures of Mina with Trina's body at an apple orchard are shown, with Trina faceplanting into a basket of apples) | |
(Trina smashes out the front door of the mall with lip gloss on her grille, pink hub caps, and a pink headband with a purple flower on it) | |
Trina | Nick's gonna love this headband! |
Kon | AH! |
(Kon jumps onto Trina's bonnet) | |
Trina | Hit the road! |
(Trina's bonnet opens, flinging Kon into the air) | |
Kon | AHH! |
Corey | Trina! Your soul is trapped in your car! We're going to get you out! |
Trina | No way! Being a car is great! I can cut any line at the mall and I can crush so much more of people than just their spirits! |
(Trina revs her engine) | |
Corey | Hmm... |
Laney | Uh, Core?! |
(Kin appears with a new soul-amplifying camera and points it at Trina) | |
!Kin | Watch the birdie! |
Corey | Wait! |
(Corey puts his hand over the camera lens) | |
Corey | Y'know Trina, since you're a car, you should take Nick to the drive-in! It's 50's night, and nothing is more 50's than kissing at the drive-in. |
(Trina's bonnet and trunk open) | |
Trina | Me and Nick kissing at the drive-in?! So yes! |
(Trina drives away, with flames following her) | |
Kin | Why'd you let her go?! |
Corey | Because I think I know how we can get her soul out of her car and her lyrics out of her soul in one shot. |
Kon | (sarcastically) Nobody check on Kon! I'm sure his ribs are fine! |
(Pictures of Mina with Trina's body at a goat farm are shown, with some goats eating Trina's hair) | |
(The scene transitions to Nick Mallory looking at an old car) | |
Nick Mallory | Cool cars are Nick Mallory's favorite kind of cars. |
(Trina honks and smashes the other car out of the frame) | |
Trina | Hey, Nick! |
(Trina opens her door) | |
Trina | Hop in! |
Nick | Girl car? Nick has a new favorite kind of car. |
(Trina controls her seatbelts to bind Nick and pull him inside the car) | |
Nick | Wow! WAH! |
(Trina drives off, leaving a trail of fire) | |
(This Could Lead to Somethin'!) | |
(The scene transitions to Grojband at Movie-in-your-Car Barn) | |
Movie-in-your-Car Barney | Welcome to 50's night! My 50's style rollerskate waitress quit today, so I'll be taking your orders myself. |
(After styling his hair, Barney tries to skate off the stage, but falls over) | |
Movie-in-your-Car Barney | Wha-oosh! [painfully] Be patient... |
Bertha | My, this brings back memories! |
(Bertha's car is knocked out of the way by Trina, who then assumes the parking space) | |
Trina | Times change, somebody's grandma! Outta the way! |
Nick | Way to score a prime spot, girl car. |
(A horn honks as Mina parks next to Trina's car, still carrying her body) | |
Mina | Surprise BFF movie night! I couldn't let the trip end with the ziplining. |
(A photo is shown of the pair ziplining, with Trina's body hanging upside down by her leg) | |
Mina | Popcorn's on me! (whistles) |
(Mina walks away) | |
Kin | Huh. Mina had Trina's body this whole time. Good thing we didn't blast her soul out earlier. |
Laney | So, what's the plan, Core? |
Corey | Nick Mallory gets weirded out because he's on a date with a car. Trina loses it and we blast her soul back into her skin in time to diary up some lyrics. |
(Nick is shown caressing Trina's seatbelt) | |
Nick | Your seatbelts and airbags make me feel safe, and picking me up made me feel special! |
(Nick rubs Trina's seat, leading to her giggling) | |
Laney | Looks like Nick is kinda into dating a car. |
Corey | No problem! If Nick's so into it, maybe he needs to make his move! |
(Corey leaves the stage and emerges in the backseat of Trina's car, where he then whispers in Nick's ear before disappearing behind the seat again) | |
Nick | Nick's ear just had a great idea. It's 50's night, and there's nothing more 50's than kissing at a drive-in. |
(Nick leaves Trina's car) | |
Trina | Kissing? Kissing?! |
(Trina giggles while honking her horn) | |
Nick | Havin' a great night, girl car. |
(Nick leans into Trina's bonnet ornament to kiss it) | |
Trina | I can't believe it. Finally! |
(Trina's bonnet opens due to her excitement, hitting Nick in the head) | |
Nick | Nick's had a... change of heart. |
(Nick collapses) | |
Trina | Nick! Nick! No! My big chromey love was too heavy for you! I'M A METAL MONSTER! |
(Trina cries loudly as she sprays wiper fluid) | |
Corey | Huh. I was thinking Trina would go diary after finally kissing Nick. But this works too! Kin! Now! |
(Kin approaches with the soul-amplifying camera) | |
Kin | Say, "Limburger!" |
(Kin takes a photo of Trina's car, causing her crying soul to fly out of it and enter Crying Soul Diary Mode before falling back into her body) | |
Trina | Gah! |
(Trina looks over her body as Mina returns with popcorn) | |
Mina | I got extra butter for you! |
(Corey catches Trina's diary) | |
Laney | We've got lyrics, but now we can't use the machine to amp up our souls. |
Corey | Yeah, but this is full of pain and longing straight from the soul! |
(Corey puts on a pair of sunglasses) | |
Corey | Let's testify! |
(Grojband performs "These Old Rusty Eyes") | |
Corey (singing) | These old rusty eyes are crying for you! |
Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | My love weighed too much, then we were through. |
Corey (singing) | And now that you're gone, it ain't no surprise |
Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | That I've got some tears in my eyes. |
Kin (singing) | In these old rusty, |
Kon (singing) | In these old rusty, |
Corey/Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | E-e-e-eyes! |
Corey (singing) | But I wipe 'em away, I lift my chin high! |
Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | Wipe 'em away. Hold 'em really high! |
Corey (singing) | 'Cause I'm here to stay, though you said goodbye! |
Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | You said goodbye! You said goodbye! |
Kin (singing) | Yeah, it's true, |
Kon (singing) | These eyes are, |
Corey (singing) | Shinin' like new! |
Corey/Laney/Kin/Kon (singing) | Yeah! |
(The song ends with the audience cheering and throwing popcorn on stage) | |
(The scene transitions to the band eating popcorn while watching a Frankenstein movie) | |
Movie-in-your-Car Barney | You guys was great! You wanna play my '60s night next week? |
Corey | Thanks, Movie In Your Car Barney, but we're not really feeling it. |
(A spotlight shines on Corey) | |
Corey | There are just some things you shouldn't do with your car, like date it, or let it kiss you. |
(Movie-in-your-Car Barney falls over) | |
Corey | Times have changed, and you can't go back! No matter how magic and weird your dream-catching soul camera is. |
(The spotlight turns off) | |
Kon | Man, I don't know why you wasted so much time with that toast! There's nothing like popcorn! |
(Kon eats a handful of popcorn and "clinks" popcorn buckets with Kin) | |
Corey | Thanks for coming out, everyone! |
(Corey closes the garage door and the toaster pops up having burnt an angry face into a piece of toast) |